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Friday, February 21, 2020

Stupid Rules

     Running any organization, large or small, is a tough job and you are bound to be disliked by half of the folks you're ruling. 
     Some rules leaders make defy logic while some rules that seem ridiculous actually once had a real purpose. The Arizona law that prohibits shooting camels dates back to the days of the United States Camel Corps, an army experiment to use camels for military forces. Read MORE... 
     In Indiana it’s illegal to catch fish with your bare hands. Apparently this law is designed to prevent “noodling” which is fishing for catfish using one's bare hands; it’s practiced primarily in the southern United States. But, why is it that in Juneau, Alaska there is a law prohibiting you from bringing your pet flamingo into a barbershop? 
     Back in 1961 in Gainesville, Georgia a law was added to the city code as a publicity stunt making it illegal to eat fried chicken in “the poultry capital of the world” with anything other than your fingers. The thing is, this is a law and technically it is possible to be arrested for violating it, though nobody has. Still, it could happen. 
     Corporations have their share of equally stupid rules. Apple has a rule in its stores that employees cannot correct customers. If they ask for an aPhone, it’s considered condescending to say, “Do you mean an iPhone?” 
     Phil Libin, former CEO of software company Evernote, made a rule that if you wanted to talk to a coworker in the office, you couldn't do it by phone or e-mail; you had to get up and mosey over to their office and talk to them in person. 
     In 2013, employers at Sparrows, an offshore oil and gas services company in Scotland, sent a memo to employees informing them that milk, while still permitted on the premises, could no longer be used in cereal. They were informed that company purchased milk was for use in tea or coffee and added, "The use of this milk for cereal is to cease with immediate effect." 
     Chess organizations are not above making stupid rules either. To me at least, it’s silly to think writing down a move on your scoresheet, changing you mind at the last second, crossing it out and writing down another is cheating. Hence the rule about making your move then writing it down. Blame this on Booby Fischer.
     In the early 1970s any organizer who succeeded in contacting Fischer with a tournament invitation was first quizzed about how much money they would pay him just to play. They also received a question as to whether or not his list of seven demands would be met. 
     Among those demands was the stipulation that a player could not record any move other than the one he actually played because it would be violating rule 18 (1a) which prohibits a player from consulting notes. Of course everybody remembers at the 2015 US Championship incident when Wesley So was forfeited for writing motivational notes to himself and his opponent GM Varuzhan Akobian complained that So was taking notes. 
     In order to avoid cheating the FIDE Laws include a paragraph that forbids players having smartphones, smartwatches or any other electronic devices with them during play. That makes sense considering the number of cheating incidents on record these days. 
     GM Ruslan Ponomariov set a record of sorts when in 2003 at the European Team Championship he became the first GM ever to forfeit a game for allowing his mobile phone to ring during his game. 
     It seems the Indian chess officials have taken stupidity to the limit when Indian IM C.R.G. Krishna recently won on a forfeit over Indian GM Baskaran Adhiban in the third round of the National Team Open in India. 
     While FIDE regulations rule out only electronic devices, in national events in India the wearing of all types of watches is prohibited! Apparently arbiters in India aren’t considered to be too bright because in March 2018, the All India Chess Federation leadership banned the use of all wristwatches. Why? To simplify matters for arbiters who evidently are deemed incapable of telling the difference between an analog and a digital watch. 
Krishna
     Unaware of the prohibition against watches in his home country, Adhiban was wearing his analog watch during a game for his team, Petroleum Sports Promotion Board, against Krishna, who was playing for Railway Sports Promotion Board. Nine moves into the game Krishna noticed the watch and informed the arbiter, who forfeited Adhiban. 
     Krishna wasn’t the first one to win in this way. In May 2018, at the KIIT Open in Orissa, India GM Martyn Kravtsiv lost to WIM V. Varshini when she claimed a win after spotting her opponent's watch. 
Varshini

     When I first read of this ridiculousness my first reaction was to think many unkind things about Krishna and Varshini for taking a cheap shot and claiming a win against an opponent they weren’t good enough to defeat over the board. But then my calmer self returned and I realized you are not being a jerk if you are following the rules. The jerks are the people that made the stupid rule.

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